Watching VH1

Happy Mother’s Day! Here is your weekly recap of VH1’s CelebReality shows “Celebrity Fit Club” and “Charm School”. The recap of “The Springer Hustle” will be up sometime tomorrow since it doesn’t air for the first time until late this evening. Enjoy the recaps after the jump.

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Celebrity Fit Club—

Last week, Dustin “quit” the show, but he did show up in Colorado for this week’s fit camp. Ant tells them it’s time to vote a member off their team. Maureen has a really hard time. Tiffany and Maureen vote for Kimberley, Kim votes for Tiffany, and Brat votes for Maureen, so Kimberley is sent to the other team. Dustin votes for Ross because he’s friends with Maureen and everyone else votes for Dustin. Brat is upset they have to get Dustin because he won’t follow the eating plan. Dustin agrees to change his eating habits for his new team.

But, wait! There’s a new twist. Dustin gets to choose one guy to come with him and Kimberley gets to chose one girl. Dustin brings Ross over and Kimberley picks Da Brat because she wants an “athletic” team. This offends Maureen, and they name their new team “the Athletes”. Dustin is happy with his new team.

The fit clubbers have to cross country ski, snowshoe, and then ride a tube to a finish line. The winners get a lot of outdoor athletic gear. They all get a crash course (meaning falling down a lot) in cross country skiing. The first team to go is the blue team. Cledus really turns it up in the cross country skiing and gets to the snowshoes quickly. The rest of his team catches up and they have trouble getting their snowshoes on. They finally get things going on again and finish the course in a little over 10 minutes.

The red team starts and the blue team laughs as Dustin falls on his skis. Dustin again holds up his team as his snowshoes come off and the rest plow on. Maureen begins having trouble and she and Dustin struggle as Ross and Tiffany keep going. Eventually they all make it to the end and just barely lose by about 40 seconds.

The weigh in takes place at the resort and Cledus goes first. He just looks good. His weight is now at 190 lbs., losing 7 lbs. He’s very happy and tells the panel his new workout regimen is to have his bus go up a mile and then he gets off and runs to catch up with it. He says it’s a small price to pay for feeling as good as he does. He says he’s going to get some hair, too. His next goal is 3 lbs.

Ross is next, and he has been elected his new team’s captain. He weighs in at 191 lbs., losing a total of 7 lbs. Stacy asks him if he still feels funny now that he’s thin, and he says he is who he is even though he’s now a chiseled love machine. He says he can sleep with more people now and Harvey calls him a chiseled love machine as he gives him the target of 4 lbs.

Kimberley steps up to the scale and weighs in at 160 lbs. meeting her goal of 5 lbs. She is surprised at this because she had a tough time when her Grandmother died. She cries and Stacy tells her she needs to grieve. Her next goal is 4 lbs.

Maureen gets up to weigh and she loses 5 lbs. to bring her to 127 lbs. She’s so excited. She’s lost a total of 15.3% of her body weight. Stacy then makes Maureen cry by making her talk about her mom dying and how she misses her. Harvey gives her a target of 3 lbs.

Da Brat weighs in at 161 lbs. meaning she lost 3 lbs. Cledus gives her a big kiss for losing some. Dr. Ian isn’t as impressed. He tells her she’s lost the lowest body weight percentage of anyone. She makes some more excuses about seeing her family and eating whatever they cook. Stacy tells her to stop making excuses and just own up to her mistakes. Harvey had sent Brat to go dog sled racing as a form of exercise. She has a great time and hits a tree. She gets a target of 5 lbs. Ant and Dr. Ian agree to give her $100 if she loses 7 lbs. and Harvey said he would get in on that if she loses 8 lbs. If she doesn’t make it, then she has to pay everyone.

Warren heads up to weigh in and loses another 6 lbs. bringing him to 200 lbs. and he doesn’t believe it because he’s been eating steak and hamburgers. Dr. Ian tells him these things are acceptable to eat, but they just have to eat sensibly. He then busts Warren’s chops for drinking and asks him to limit it to one drink. Stacy asks about him voting off Dustin and Warren says he wanted Brat and Dustin on the same team because he’s tired of them fighting and wants them to have a better relationship. Harvey told him at the first fit camp he looked like Reggie Bush, but now he looks like Barbara Bush. He says he stayed back to help the girls and Harvey laughs at that excuse. His next target is 4 lbs.

The cameras followed Tiffany to her last stage show to see if she’s still out of breath now she’s been on Fit Club for a month. She wears a new slinky dress and tells the crowd about being on Fit Club. She admits she wasn’t comfortable in the dress, but she wasn’t out of breath at all. She weighs in at 137 lbs., meaning she lost 5 lbs. She is shocked she lost all 5 lbs. Stacy asks about watching herself perform and Tiffany admits she was totally uncomfortable. Harvey asks her about her loss of energy and he tells Tiffany that he’ll call her trainer and tell him to stop overtraining her. Her next target is 4 lbs.

Dustin’s the only one left and he goes up to weigh. He has lost 8 lbs. bringing him all the way down to 200 lbs. He asks for a slice of pizza as his team cheers for him. Dr. Ian congratulates him and Dustin says he still won’t follow the diet exactly and will bump heads with the panel because that’s the way he is. Stacy asks if this is the new Dustin and he says no, but he’s not as stressed as he was. He would have voted himself off, too, so he’s okay with that and he loves his new team. Harvey gives him a goal of 6 lbs. and he balks at that. Dr. Ian explains to him that to meet his goal, he has to have a higher goal and to just go with it. Dustin eventually backs down and agrees.

There are no giant scales in Colorado, so Ant just tells them their numbers. The red team is ahead with a total of 10.3% of their total weight lost. The blue team is close behind at 9.2%.

Next week: Dustin is back to being a trash talker. He wants to fight Ant, makes fun of Maureen, and offers to buy Kimberley a toy from his porn show, which makes the cast walk out. Harvey totally goes off on him and threatens to beat him up. More drama ahead!

Charm School—

Last week, Cristal was expelled after being benched for the debate. This week starts off with the girls getting ready and Larissa and Shay talk about how nasty Brooke is for making out with random guys at the bar. This week’s commandment is “Thou Shalt Mind Thy Money” and they figure out they are going to have to sell something.

They all jump on the short bus and head to a place to learn how to make a living. They will be creating their own fragrances and then sell them. Becky says no one should go to college because it’s just a scam to take your money. The teacher Sarah wants them to focus on how they want the customer to feel. Brooke says Larissa will have the hardest time because she smells like a rotten orange. They learn some marketing and their eyes glaze over as Sarah puts up a math equation. Becky says she’s okay with math unless they get up to the 9s because she didn’t get that high in the times tables.

They have to create their perfumes in teams and then sell them the next day at an open air market. Mikki tells Brooke, Larissa, and Shay they will interview and choose 2 other people to be on their team. They interview the girls and Saaphyri pretends to sell her Charm School pin by saying it was from some royalty overseas. Darra rambles on and on about all the sales she has done. Leilene starts asking the CEOs questions about their company, and that didn’t impress Larissa.

They all fight over who they want or don’t want on the team. Larissa and Shay just grab up pictures of who they want and leave Brooke with Darra and Leilene. They refuse to negotiate with her and accuse her of being racist. After much arguing, the teams end up being Larissa, Saaphyri, Courtney vs. Shay, Schatar, Becky vs. Brooke, Darra, Leilene. The other two CEOs tell Leilene that no one wanted her, but Brooke tells her she’s sexy and she’ll sell.

Larissa’s team is the first to make their fragrance. Saaphyri suggests they make their fragrance smell like gasoline. They do a lot of sniffing. The other teams work on marketing and Shay’s team decides part of their profits will go to Breast Cancer charity. Brooke’s team decides their fragrance will be called “Flavor of Love” and their tag line is “When it comes to love, what’s your flavor?” Larissa’s group finishes their fragrance and they think it sort of smells like bug spray. Their learning session is over and they head back to the house.

At the house, they find everything they need to make displays, posters, and bottles. Larissa’s group’s fragrance is called “La Sacour” from the first letters of their names. They are trying to figure out how to market it and come up with some strange ideas of people sitting on a toilet.

Meanwhile, Brooke’s team is naked and taking pictures with strategically placed hands and the name of their perfume written on their arms. Shay spies on them and calls them tramps and whores. When Brooke’s team goes downstairs, they see a note saying the losing CEOs will automatically be called to the carpet.

The next day they all get dressed up to go sell their perfumes. The girls try to put the perfume into the bottles and Saaphyri figures out they need a funnel. After several attempts and much spilled perfume, they get their bottles filled and go to Hollywood and Highland to sell their bottles. The winning team will be immune from expulsion. Brooke thinks Larissa’s team is the weakest and Larissa is sure Brooke’s is the worst.

Becky gets Buckwild and takes pictures with people as they buy the perfume. Leilene sprays some perfume on her cleavage and lets men smell it as they sell lots of bottles. Meanwhile, Larissa’s team is missing and she’s getting mad. They eventually get there and start telling people all of their proceeds are going to Breast Cancer charities.

A guy goes up to Brooke and tells her he’ll buy a bottle if she spits on him and she does. There is only a minute left and they all scramble to sell at the last second. Keith and Mikki take the cash boxes back to Mo and will decide who will be leaving.

When the girls get back to the house, Larissa and Shay start getting on Leilene about being a stripper and using her body to sell the perfume. Leilene walks away as they call her a tramp and a whore. Everyone gets called down to the grand hall to find out who wins. Larissa tells Keith $1 from each bottle will be given and Keith asks Saaphyri if that’s how she sold it. She says she didn’t know that and then he calls out Larissa for not talking to her employees as the CEO. She fumbles and says they didn’t decide how much, but now they have and it’s $1. So their group made a total of $165 after giving their profit to charity.

Shay’s group also was giving money to charity and decided to go with 5% of their overall profits. They end up with $318 and they are happy. Brooke’s group didn’t make any promises about giving money to charity and they got $463 and blowing away the competition. Becky is amazed the other team won and Saaphyri says they sold the perfume with some sex. Larissa and Shay will be on the carpet. Shay says the third person should be from Larissa’s team because they were the last place team.

Larissa decides to call her boyfriend and the line goes dead just as Brooke walks down the stairs, so Larissa accuses her of pulling the phone cord. She gets up in Brooke’s face and yells a lot as everyone else stands around watches. Brooke wants Larissa to hit her so she goes home. Shay vows she won’t let Larissa do that. Larissa goes to see Mo and asks if she’s going home. Larissa accuses Brooke of pulling the plug and Mo calls Brooke into the room to get her side of the story. Mo is appalled Larissa called Brooke a white bitch and makes her apologize.

The elimination ceremony begins and Mo tells Brooke her team did a great job. Shay and Larissa are called down to the carpet. Mo asks Larissa who from her team needs to be on the carpet with them and she chooses Courtney because she wasn’t aggressive enough in selling. Becky said she’s not mad Courtney was called to the carpet because she’s just been sliding by.

All three girls get some advice and sized up by Keith and Mikki. Mo then tells Shay she appreciates her growth and how she has been giving it her all. She is only on the carpet because it was part of the rules. She tells Larissa it may be her night because she’s been a handful. Courtney is told she hasn’t been growing because she’s always on the fence. Mo surprisingly expels Courtney because the others need the Charm School more. Mo tells Courtney she can come with her on tour to hone her act and Courtney is happy with that. Brooke is upset because Larissa didn’t get expelled. Mo’s final words to the girls are to not go into the perfume business because they all stink.

Next week they all donate their clothes to a thrift store. Darra and Saaphyri get into it and Shay and Larissa find something under Schatar’s bed.