Watching VH1

WatchingVH1.com brings you the first review of this week’s CelebReality shows on VH1. Did you know the new episodes are shown Sunday afternoons before their advertised premieres of Sunday night? Check out the TV schedule to find out when the episodes air. This week, Charm School and The Springer Hustle were new in the afternoon.

So what happened on this week’s episodes of Charm School (Dirty Drawers Done Dirt Cheap) and The Springer Hustle (Episode 2)? In order not to spoil it for those of you who want to watch it tonight, I will put my mini-recap of Charm School, full recap of The Springer Hustle and commentary after the jump. Full recaps of Charm School and the premiere of Celebrity Fit Club: Men vs. Women will be up sometime tomorrow.

VH1, VH1 CelebReality, Charm School, The Springer Hustle, VH1 show Recap, Charm School Recap, Springer Hustle Recap

Charm School—

Commandment 3 is the theme of this challenge: Thou Shalt Show Some Class. Etiquette coach Collette Swann arrives to teach them how to be proper ladies—how to walk and sit, walk with a book on their heads, and good table manners.

Andrew Firestone, the ex-bachelor, will be testing them at dinner. They have to pair up and they get 15 minutes with Andrew after which he will chose one from each group to join him at dinner. Two will be chosen to join him for desert, and then one will go with him the next night to a special event and is immune from leaving. They have to pick partners they think they can beat. All of Heather/Krazy’s clothes are stolen when she’s in the shower and she flips out. Schatar/Hottie hid all of the clothes in the kitchen to rattle her opponent Heather. Brooke/Pumkin goes to look for them, and finds them in the kitchen. Sexy stripper music plays as Andrew is introduced and Becky/Buckwild says she doesn’t watch crazy white people shows, but he’s cute. Whoever he chooses will help him premiere a new winery at an event.

As the girls meet with Andrew, Mo’Nique and Mikki watch from the office. He chooses Darra/Like Dat, Cristal/Serious, Leilene/Smiley, Becky/Buckwild, Larissa/Bootz, and Schatar after she admits to hiding Heather’s dress during the interview with Andrew. Heather loses her composure and Mo’Nique says she’s the victim a lot.

Becky is excited but nervous so she’s putting Buckwild aside. Schatar immediately talks about her charity work. Larissa calls her a “Whack ass bitch with a whack ass weave and a whack ass ass,” I couldn’t have said it better myself. Becky says she’s funny and busts out a rap about her booty. Larissa doesn’t have answers for the questions he asks. Cristal talks and talks and doesn’t stop. Darra was humble and well composed. Leilene made a toast and did very well to Mo’Nique’s kudos. Darra and Schatar were chosen to go on to desert. Darra is very well-spoken, and Schatar says has to out-think her to beat her this time. She brings up some story about her mom in a wheel chair and when she walks the red carpet she thinks about her and she’s crying. Darra’s mad that it’s a fake story, but Andrew buys it and offers Schatar the invitation to the special event.

Meanwhile, Brooke gets Schatar’s dirty underwear and hangs it on her picture to humiliate her. When Schatar gets to the room she’s too busy gloating and doesn’t notice the picture with her dirty underwear. They have to point it out before she sees it and then she pretends they aren’t hers. That’s just disgusting, but I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised about this considering it came from the girl who spit in another girl’s mouth.

The next day, the girls have to make lunch for Mo’Nique from her cookbook. Saaphyri says she’ll succeed because she can cook while Leilene is having yet another anxiety attack because she doesn’t know how to cook. At the winery, Schatar is excited to be with upper crust people, but then she trips at the entrance and falls down. HA!

Saaphyri says what I’ve been trying to figure out—how can you have 3 kids and not be able to cook? Everyone else is cooking while Leilene is still upstairs psyching herself up. They are pretty much all done with lunch when she gets to the kitchen and she’s trying to find something to do and no one wants her help. She’s making a grilled cheese sandwich.

Andrew explains the wine and what’s going on in the presentation and what Schatar’s supposed to do. She overacts her part and mispronounces Paso Robles. When she goes to unveil the picture of the winery to the panel, she knocks it off the easel and laughs like a maniac. Such a delicious disaster! Those panelists probably think she polished off a few bottles of that wine in the limo on the way over (and maybe she did and that’s why she fell down).

Mo’Nique joins them for lunch and the girls out Leilene for only making grilled cheese and making excuses. She cries again and Mo’Nique eats her grilled cheese to make her feel better. All the girls complain to Mo’Nique about Schatar winning and then Mo’Nique calls Heather out for being a victim.

Andrew says Schatar needs to be more refined in dress code and the panel was shocked when things fell over as he sends her home. Mo’Nique asks the girls to imitate other girls in the house. Most people laugh at what the others say about them, but Saaphyri and Cristal get into it. The point was Cristal talks too much about herself and then Cristal rambles on and on about why she talks so much, proving Saaphyri’s point.

Elimination ceremony time—Mo’Nique says Schatar was dirty for tricking Heather and Andrew, but she’s safe from being expelled. Larissa, Heather, and Cristal are called to the carpet. The judges give their opinions about each girl and Mo’Nique tells Cristal to stop talking, Larissa to grow up, and expels Heather for being the victim all the time and for thinking she’s already a star. In fact, she wrote Nevaeh on the back of her pledge pin.

Next week is a fashion show! Now THAT’S entertainment!

Springer Hustle—

Toby is a producer who used to work for The Jerry Springer Show before he got addicted to drugs and had to take a few years off before he got clean. He only has one story for his show in 2 days so he gets on his casting team to work harder. He’s looking for a classic white trash Springer show. He has a white trash love triangle, but he needs a good hillbilly segment.

He called Richard to get his job back once he got clean and Richard agreed he could come back because he always got those really bizarre guests and good stories. His assistant Julie starts calling anyone she can to get those stories. He has a guy who loves his pig more than his girlfriend in mind, but he doesn’t know if he can pull it off. Toby decides he’ll feel better if tapes an assistant to her desk, so Kristi is the victim. He’s got the hillbilly story, but they can’t fly in the pig, so Richard tells him he has to fly to Kentucky and film the pig. There is only 20 hours until show time, so he gets on a plane and flies to Kentucky with assistant Gabe who will drive the pig back to the show.

The house is a stereotypical hillbilly house and Lisa the pig runs free in the house. “She’s more than a pet,” the hillbilly Harley says. They film him as they have quiet time on the porch. The hillbilly’s pissed off girlfriend has a shotgun in the kitchen and then starts shaking a voodoo stick at the pig to put a curse on it. Toby is thrilled with this footage and heads back to Chicago as Gabe takes Harley and the pig with him in the car.

Toby gets back and he hasn’t slept, but he still needs to write the intros and everything. Julie’s job is to pick up the pieces after Toby as he gives instructions for show day. He asks another producer Annette for her template for a script because he hasn’t written anything at all. The show is in 5 hours and it’s pouring rain which is slowing down the pig in transit.

He briefs the guests with words they can’t say on air and tells them to get serious and throw chairs if they need to. It’s now 3:00 and the pig is still in Indianapolis, 2 ½ hours away. Toby goes over the show with another producer Rachelle. He then helps the guests get worked up by role playing with them and yelling a lot. He gets her mad and then makes her cry as he hugs her. We then see Toby guzzling several Red Bulls and yelling for Julie.

Gabe, Harley, and Lisa the pig show up just in time. They decide to start with the pig instead of Ada the angry girlfriend at the last second. Toby prays backstage while they show the video. He says it wasn’t weird and funny and goofy and Richard was disappointed that Harley is saying the same thing over and over again. Ada comes out and is boring so Richard is really mad now.

The next segment is just as bad as the story just falls through the cracks. The “respectable mother” starts taking off her clothes and Richard is ready to kill Toby. Later, Richard confronts Toby and tells him he has a bizarre loyalty to him but he needs to deliver next time, or he needs to pack his bags and go. Rachelle tells him that he used to be one of the best producers they’ve ever had but tonight’s show proves he doesn’t know what they are doing anymore. Toby promises to do better next time and that he wants to be there.

Next week: There is Steve! Oh how I love Steve the security guard. Apparently Toby wants to play bounty hunter to get his next show, but will it work?